The joy of stillness

Chaotic days are far from over. New house, new city and new boundaries- to learn and set. The unfinished tasks are mocking the perfectionist and control freak in me. Not a minute goes by without my brain flashing the never ending checklist- the one I want to chuck away without even looking at.

In this mayhem, come the days when you want to just pause- even your brain. Stretch your leg and just watch the endless sky. Not stopping to wonder what patterns the clouds are making. Not thinking whether I should take a pic to show the world what i feel. Not planning the next task for today or the days to come. Not dwelling on what went wrong in the past. 

I wish there was a remote controller for thoughts- something to pause them. To just float like a cloud, without direction and without worrying where it will take me. Just feeling the breeze. Closing my eyes. May be I will see what I haven't seen before. Or hear what I couldn't. May be I will discover the quite joy in simply existing.

That's the ecstacy I am searching for- a few minutes of detachment from who I think I am and from how others see me. A new perspective. Just as I was born.

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